January 2011
88 posts
- Mom: Does the puppy have a name?
- Me: Shiloh. But I call him Puppy because I'm a brat.
“I just want someone who understands my sarcasm over BBM” -Julia Chesky
Agreed x 1000. I don’t want to have to explain myself. No sarcasm. Or (0) if you will.
- Chels: She was pulling on me!
- Ashley: Well you have to say if you want it hard.
- Me: That's what she said!!!
- Ashley: Yeah I set that one up for you... On purpose.
- Me: I take cues from Blair Waldorf.
- Haley: Wow. I might need to tweet that. cc @dkny.
- Me: Yeah, but it's about thigh highs!
- Roommate: I want to a new FB pic...is this a good one or no?
- Me: I mean, it's creepy. When people take pics of themselves it's weird.
- Roommate: Lol...okay
- Me: and creepy.
- Me: and you look like the unabomber.
- Roommate: Okay. Okay.
- Keepin' it honest, y'all.
I will clean my whiskers from the sink.
How ironic. People remember #ilivewithmyex, right? Ah yes.
- me: everything is turning out swimmingly
- Haley: excellent word
- me: thank you
- me: i should tweet it.
- Roommate: That chicken I have in the CrockPot smells good, huh?
- Me: Yeah, but that's not exactly what I want to smell right when I wake up...
- Roommate: When I woke up I thought you were cooking.
- Me: Have we met?
I had a dream Kate Bosworth and I were dressed up as farmers from south Florida and we were robbing something. We got the cash and were running to the car and I said, “Wait! Check around the corner!” and sure enough, the FBI was there waiting on us. The same FBI guys from that one season of “Weeds.” Jerks.
I had a dream Kate Bosworth and I were dressed up as farmers from south Florida and we were robbing something. We got the cash and were running to the car and I said, “Wait! Check around the corner!” and sure enough, the FBI was there waiting on us. The same FBI guys from that one season of “Weeds.” Jerks.
